Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life—even though invisible to spectators—is with Christ in God. He is your life. When Christ (your real life, remember) shows up again on this earth, you’ll show up, too—the real you, the glorious you. Meanwhile, be content with obscurity, like Christ.
And that means killing off everything connected with that way of death: sexual promiscuity, impurity, lust, doing whatever you feel like whenever you feel like it, and grabbing whatever attracts your fancy. That’s a life shaped by things and feelings instead of by God. It’s because of this kind of thing that God is about to explode in anger. It wasn’t long ago that you were doing all that stuff and not knowing any better. But you know better now, so make sure it’s all gone for good: bad temper, irritability, meanness, profanity, dirty talk……Colossians 3:4-8
Yesterday was an interesting day to me. We cleaned house, as we do almost every weekend. Then we started talking about our house. Our house is seventy some years old. I have replaced things here and there, but we were talking about windows and how twenty windows I replaced three of them and a couple of years ago i replaced two and how they don’t match. As in brand. They are all painted white and look okay to me. My wife meant it one way and I took it a different way. I took it as the work I did was a complete waste of time. That it was no good. I took it personally and it hurts my feelings when someone degrades what I have done. I am a sensitive guy and I tend to take things personally. When things go wrong, I feel like it is my fault. That old shame on you rears it’s ugly head and waves of anger and guilt wash over you. My whole life I have felt like it is my fault. Am i saying all this to get sympathy or attention? Is this the old me that needs to die off. Can I have my feelings and be lovable, or should i hide my feelings away and just be a yes man? Maybe something is truly wrong with me. Maybe i need therapy. For the life of me I cannot figure out why God wired me this way.
No one knows what it’s like, To be the bad man,To be the sad man, Behind blue eyes…
Being introverted, I think I live in my own little world. I wear my heart on my sleeve and it can get beat up pretty easily. I can take things personally and it will wreck me. I search for hidden agendas in peoples words and actions. I can take offense pretty easy and I am hurt when I feel left out or neglected. I can care with a passion, but when that care gets used and abused, i can lose interest. Most of all I am afraid I will lose a relationship with God. I will miss what He has in store for me, or misunderstand His intention or meaning. I know He has my best intentions in mind and is always looking out for me, but I just feel like I am missing it. Oh, sorry you are just a little late on that one,we will catch you next time around. You are just a little short again. maybe I am a little weird. I just missed the blessing boat by ten minutes. Now that you have been to prison, you have to spend the rest of your life doing things the hard way. No soup for you.
Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.
I know that His Spirit is within me. We are friends and then some. I know that I am a work in progress, and so is everyone else. The should be an abundant load of grace that we pour out on each other. There should also be the freedom to be ourselves. The grace to have feelings, to be cared for, to be thankful for what we have. To just enjoy life. Not to be hindered by another person’s thoughts or ideology. Just because a person thinks life should be a certain way, does that mean it is true? Is there freedom to be me anymore? Should I just become a mindless drone and cave into the way that society thinks I should be. A non feeling, non caring mindless twit looking for his next hand out. I think not. I am going to be the person that God has created me to be, warts and all. I guess I am just that guy who needs attention, a pat on the back, and some encouragement. A person who hates to feel neglected, but doesn’t want the spot light to be shining on my self. I just want to live a good life. I just want to be me.