I’d gone through so much other stuff, that walking down the aisle was tough, but now I know it’s not enough, I want to be a clone…….Steve Taylor
the power of acting without the constraint of necessity or fate; the ability to act at one’s own discretion.
I have walked with God for over twenty-five years now,, well give or take a year or two. There was a time i walked like a duck and talked like a duck and thought I did all the right things. Did what everyone else did, went to church two to three times a week, led a home group, helped with Sunday school and even was a greeter. I wore the right t-shirts, listened to the latest Christian music, read the newest and latest books. Man, I’m on top of the world. Tithing left and right, helping people move, and so on. I’m in, I figured. I learned to speak Christenese, I’m really a good Christian, look at me, I thought. I am friends with everyone. I am saved. I have a cross hanging on my car, a fish on the back, I am telling everyone I am in Love with Jesus. I have to be doing the right thing.
I asked the Lord into my heart, they said that was the way to start, but now you’ve got to play the part, I want to be a clone….Steve Taylor
Then I started seeing things that made me feel uncomfortable. People who would say one thing, but do another. People who would talk behind another’s back. People who would call the police on a homeless man, rather than help. They would help you, if you were a useful tool in the church. If you served a purpose. If you tithed, if you followed someone else’s dream, blindly. If you gave up your dream to serve another purpose, then your were useful.
Be a clone and kiss conviction goodnight, cloneliness is next to Godliness, right? I’m grateful that they show the way, ’cause I could never know the way, to serve him on my own….I want to be a clone……Steve Taylor
Still there was a different aspect to me. I studied my bible, I went to hear about Christ from different teachers.I was told everything that I needed in Christ is right here at this church. I wanted more than what the local church was selling, or making me pay for. I started walking out during the sermon to have a cigarette, I was gaze out the window while the guy preached. I watched people walk by and wondered what they thought. There has to be more to this walking with Christ than sitting here listening to some guy ramble about stuff that is not where I am even at,,,,so God told me to leave. It was a hard choice to make for, my whole walk with God started with this place and now I felt I was supposed to leave what my identity was wrapped up in?
They told me that I’d fall away, unless I followed what they say, who needs the Bible anyway?……..I want to be a clone….Steve Taylor
Then I started thinking more about life. Why wouldn’t God want to be apart of my everyday life? Why do I have to conform and be like everyone else? What if that is where the freedom lies. What if we are still putting ourselves under some form of the law. I shouldn’t do this, or I can’t do that, or what will people say, or you better shape up because God is watching. Look busy cause Jesus is coming. So i dig this hole of shame because I really don’t believe that Jesus came to set me free. So I live under this guilt that others lay on me because they do not know how to walk in freedom either, so if i can’t be free, you shouldn’t be either. So this whole vicious cycle of the shame and blame game starts and i walk around feeling sorry for myself because I forgot that i am not under the law. So I can be quick to judge and I know what is right and what is wrong, because I don’t want to be free. Where is Eve, I need another bite of that apple.
People get ready, For something like you’ve never seen,,,,Open up your eyes,,,Open up your heart,,,,Open up your arms,,,,And let the Spirit of the Savior set you free….Third Day
- I am referring to the other person’s conscience, not yours. For why is my freedom being judged by another’s conscience? ….1 Corinthians 10:29
- Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom…2 Corinthians 3:17
- It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery….Galatians 5:1
Is it real freedom when someone is trying to control you and manipulate you? When someone judges your actions? When they think that they know what is best for you, without consulting you? I am in a good place in my walk. I like to listen to a little rock and roll, watch a good movie and have a cold on once in a while, or more. I like to sleep in on Sunday mornings. Does all that mean I am a bad Christian? Who’s to say. I still talk to God and He talks back. I still depend on Him for life. I still pray quite often. I still need Him. I am still loved by Him. I received a couple of good compliments this week. One friend told me I was a rogue in the church. I took that as a compliment. I see things different, and maybe that is where the freedom lies. Two days later a friend told me this,”We aren’t built for the “church” we are built for the world that is afraid of the church, and for those who have been convinced that they have to have it all together to be effective ministers- that’s a load that no one needs to bear”. This all came after a dream I had. So I think I am on the right track. So what is coming is going to make some church people kind of mad. That’s okay, because Jesus made those religious freaks mad all those years ago.
I’ve learned enough to stay afloat, but not so much I rock the boat. I’m glad they shoved it down my throat,,,,,,I want to be a clone….Steve Taylor
Your boat is going to be rocked……